My biggest struggle, and something I think I am working to overcome, is balance.
I love to absorb content about self improvement and success. I listen to podcasts, read books, go to conferences. Any opportunity for growth and insight fuels me. What I always come back to though is "How do they do it?" When I listen to or read about these rockstars out conquering the education (or whatever) world, I can't wrap my mind around how they manage to balance the normal demands of the job, personal life and all the rockstar extras. Currently, I am reading Girl Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis. It has really allowed me to gain some insight on my desire to succeed at balancing it all. I'm writing this post today in an effort to work through my own thoughts and maybe help someone else work through their similar desires. 1. Timing Get ride of the timeline! It's a common problem for goal oriented people to say "I want ___ by the time I __." We've got to let go of these unrealistic limitations. I can think of a dozen times in my life when what I thought I wanted was right in front of me and I didn't get it. I remember being torn apart in the first several instances of adulthood misses. But now, when I look back I see how the pieces fell together. Had I gotten that first job, I would never have landed where I am now. It is really hard in the moment of loss or disappointment to see the big picture or have faith that it's going to work out, but at some point, we have to let our past fails guide or perspective to give us the power to move forward. We can't let our goals parish when the timeline runs out. The moments you are experiencing are all building the path to where you are meant to go. I realize my biggest ailment in my trip to success is I am always looking at whats next, instead of enjoying today's success. I've been preaching this to my younger brother and realize now that I need to take my own advice. I need to take time to enjoy each milestone and the moments that come along with it. 2. Refine your goals Rachel Hollis would probably say "No, NO Niki. Have goals, as many as you can!" In her book she writes often of the importance of having goals. I have no shortage of goals. My struggle is staying focused on the goal. I have so many goals that I can't keep them all straight or give them proper attention. I want to be a rock star teacher, I want to be a leader in my district, I want to inspire kids outside of my classroom, I want to be a leader at church, I want to be a good mom, and wife, I want to impact foster care and poverty in my community, and the list goes on and on, really. Most of these things I am already doing, but I need to evaluate whether or not I am doing them well. This is the voice that has been echoing in my head for months. I need to slow down, evaluate where my heart is truly pulling me and shift accordingly. For me, this is going to mean a painful separation from some things stealing my attention.Things I value and love, but I can't do it all, not at once at least. Which leads me to my next bit of advice: 3. Say "No" I'm not the first person to tell myself this. I've heard it 100 times. I've started each of the last few years echoing this statement and still can't get it to stick. "I'm going to take on less this year." I say over and over. The truth is I am the product of two overachievers. This is a habit that will take years to change. This year though I realized something: I want to do what I am doing well. This probably seems obvious, but every new commitment takes away from each of the previous. Saying "no" doesn't mean that I am letting anyone else down. It means I am building myself up. It allows me to give my best to where my attention needs to focus to achieve my goal and follow my heart. Teacher tips: Teaching takes a lot of balance. Standards, expectations, communication, grading.... the list goes on and on. Consider these things when seeking balance: 1. What are you passionate about? 2. What is expected of you? 3. What is necessary? 4. What matters? In reality (or at least mine) we can't do it all. Take a day to ask yourself "why am I doing _____?" Is it grading a specific assignment, or planning an assignment? With each daily activity if you can justify each of the above questions with a positive answer then keep it. Otherwise, consider letting it go. What do your students really get out of that worksheet they filled in the blanks of while you went through the answers? If the answer is "very little" is it really worth your time to prepare and then grade later? If you can eliminate some of these unnecessary things, you may be able to give yourself back some personal time, take less home, focus on something more valuable at school like small groups or individual conferences OR recess. Your personal wellbeing, your mental health, and your happiness contribute majorly to your success as a teacher.
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Niki EgelhoffI love learning and sharing ideas. Please join in my conversations. Archives
January 2019
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